"But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world"
-from Mary Oliver's "The Journey"
I'm moving out and moving onto the next stage of my life. I lived with my grandmother and mother for almost exactly two years after college. It wasn't planned, just part of the natural chaotic pattern of life that looks so much more organized five years later. Life is what happens while you're planning other things, after all!
Moving out of the nest is both exhilarating and bleeping terrifying! Suddenly, I have to buy my own food, pay the bills, and get myself to work. However, this means that if I budget right, I can eat only seasonal veggies and ethical meat if I want to. Since the apartment is closer to my job, I can ride my bike or walk to work. I'm moving in with two of my friends (who already have cats, whoot! I love cats) and for reasons of thriftiness and environmental concern we all seem to not want to use much fossil-fuel based electricity. I love the heat, so not turning on the air conditioner in summer sounds fine by me. Putting a clothesline on the balcony? Did that for years in Japan. I already have a few ideas about solar night lights and passive solar heating that I'll be going into more detail in later posts. It's going to be hard. Much harder than I probably can imagine right now, but it is going to be a great learning and growing experience.
And my grandmother's house is just on the other side of town, so my safety net won't be too far away. I'm a cautious critter *grins*
As I alternate between excited and stressed, I'm also finally realizing how awesome my grandmother and mom are. It's only when you're about to loose something that you stop taking it for granted. They've supported me my whole life, but especially after my dad died, they took me in and cared for my every need. Food, meds, books, basic electronics, gardening supplies, if I really needed it, they got it. I am so thankful to them, even as I realize that I lost a lot of the independence I had in boarding school and college. Our culture isn't really equipped for multi-generations living in one house.
They have also been great as thing to struggle against. My alma mater Warren Wilson is this little hippie paradise (even as students, teachers, and faculty keep struggling to make it better) and in the "bubble," as we call it, it is difficult to see how hard it is to recycle so much, compost most of the food waste, not abuse laborers, and to grow so much ethical meat and organic food. I moved out of that nest and realized how difficult it is to do even one of those things on my own. But my awesome parental units were there, non-judgmental in my failures and willing to listen to my environmental rants...and to poke holes in my sometimes faulty logic. I owe these folks so much that I can never repay.
Parental love-fest aside: Hold your hats folks, this environmental ride just got a lot faster and more bumpy!
